Dear Mr. Gosling,
I know this news will absolutely break your heart, but I have great faith that you'll make it, even if it's going to be really hard for you.
Because my dear Ryan, I've met someone new, and he is my new favorite man. So sorry!
His name is Øyvind, and he is a total gangster. He has a car called IronCar, is a criminal driver man, and was recently in Las Vegas where he drank the city empty for drinks and Coca Cola, He is also quite a badass, and may or may not attract a lot of cats:
But do not fear, Ryan, because I will always remember the good times we had (Like the party me and Silje held in order to make enough money to visit you when you where single, and all the times we have watched you in Lars and the Real Girl, Gangster Squad etc while drooling a Mjøsa in the popcorn bowl), and you will stay on my mobile phone deksel (Ordrered at FotoKnudsen.no by the way, I am not sponsored but work there, but are proud to say that this deksel is an exc.. ecxsell.. excellent one!) for a very long time. It is photoshopped by my great colleague Hege, but I think you look smashing as always:
So this is it, Ryan. But who can blame me, just look what Urban Dicitionary writes about Øyvinds:
I rest my case. I'm addicted. So long, Ryan! You are an amazing man. Take care!
All the best,